Waaaay back when the internet was still shiny & new, and full of nothing but star trek & erotic fiction & erotic fiction about star trek, one of my favorite pastimes was to copy & paste some random bit of erotic fiction into a Word document & use the find/replace tool to change select words that you'd expect to find in such writing, into words that you wouldn't expect to find...a little adjustment of the grammar, and then I’d be all set to e-mail the resulting masterpieces off to friends & family.

Well, for reasons I won’t go into here, I've been trying to get a feel for what sort of stuff will make it past the censors on the various Indymedia sites. Some of the editors have been real efficient at taking my posts down, while others seem not to notice or care what's up there. The worst so far has been the LA site, which doesn't seem to give a crap what you post, so long as there's nothing pro-free market involved ...so I decided to test that theory, and this old pastime came back to mind.

Here’s a little sample for you, though it’s much funnier to see it on their website…if it’s still there. (From, "Wal-Mart Sucks: Fiction")

…With my hands on your underpaid staff I stroke you. I slowly twist my head from side to side making sure my moist lips stay in contact with your obscenely-high profits. I taste more employee benefits as they ooze from the underpaid staff. Your low-low prices are very hard. And you are moaning, groaning, crying out in a whisper, “always! Always!” …I love to see you this way. So entrepreneurial. Wanting my business so bad. With one hand for you I use the other to take a few strokes up and down my sweatshop. I am wet and ready to buy; I’m not some left-wing hippie, hatin’ on you for your success. I yearn to feel your low-low prices inside me. But I must not succumb to such urges. Not yet! (Maybe after the protest.)