Okay gang, our "Bad Presidents Day" e-cards have spurred some conversation among the leftist-statists in the Indymedia world, and it's time to interject. From Indymedia Madison:

Lincoln, Nixon and ?FDR?
Someone explain to me how these were bad presidents?

I've done my fair-share of playing the defender of all ideas libertarian to the indymedia crowd. It's time for you guys to step up. (Best response gets a copy of the latest Bureaucrash video promotional CD: Crash-o-vision v2.0 - use your crasher alias on the indymedia site, so we'll know who you are.)

To post a reply, and bring a little bit of firelight into the world of those blinded by the "glory" of the state, click here. (And have fun!)

**Update** Damn, you guys rock! You're already all over this. I'm surprised none of the indymedianiks have responded yet. They were all over it last time I posted to the site ((click here & scroll down past the first 3 comments)). That's when the fun begins ;)

We'll run the "contest" until Friday, & pick a winner over the weekend.

And now for a very challenging lesson about mutually-beneficial cooperation & voluntary association:

(put your thinkin' caps on & click here.)

Please join me in wishing North Korea's kind & sensible leader, Kim Jong Il, a very happy and propserous birthday.

(Post your birthday wishes here -- you wouldn't want to be the only one not to!)

From: Central Committee, Communist Party of the Philippines

Greetings To Comrade Kim Jong Il On His Birthday

February 16, 2006

The Communist Party of the Philippines extends its warmest greetings to Comrade Kim Jong Il, General Secretary of the Workers' Party of Korea, chairman of the National Defense Commission of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea and respected leader of the Korean people.

...We wish Comrade Kim Jong Il, the Workers' Party of Korea and the Korean people more victories in the future in your struggle to build a society free from exploitation, a nation with dignity and a progressive and prosperous socialist country.

The Communist Party of the Philippines and the revolutionary Filipino people are committed to pursue our common cause of building a better world for mankind free from the exploitative and oppressive imperialist system, a world free from the dangers of war, a world of solidarity, friendship and cooperation among peoples.

LONG LIVE THE UNITY OF THE PARTY, ARMY AND PEOPLE!
LONG LIVE SOCIALISM AND COMMUNISM!
LONG LIVE MARXISM-LENINISM!
LONG LIVE PROLETARIAN INTERNATIONALISM!

From: Luis G. Jalandoni, Chief International Representative, National Democratic Front of the Philippines

...Armed with the correct ideological and political principles, he has helped develop and strengthen the Workers’ Party of Korea and the Korean People's Army into a force that is ever-ready and capable to defeat any enemy that would attack and invade Korea and seek to reverse the victories of the Korean people.

We join Comrade Kim Jong Il and the Korean people in their fervent aspiration for the peaceful reunification of their country under the banner of independence, peace and national unity.

From: Coni Ledesma, Makibaka International Spokesperson, Utrecht, the Netherlands

...He has earned the love and respect of the Korean people because of his continued efforts to safeguard the gains of the revolution and build a better world for them. His untiring efforts at working for the peaceful reunification of Korea answer the long cherished dream of the Korean people.

The Korean women appreciate the achievements of their nation under the leadership of Comrade Kim Jong Il. ...We wish Comrade Kim Jong Il many more fruitful years of service to the people.

...and there's more where that came from.

I feel sick.

I don’t even know where to begin with this one. It already says so much on its own... [Note: I’ve quoted from several articles here, but linked to each of the sources where applicable. Some things are just too funny not to repeat.]

FRANCE: AUTHORITIES MOVE OVER 'RACIST SOUP'

Officials in French cities have moved to prevent charity groups with extreme right-wing links from serving the homeless a diet of pork soup and ham sandwiches - food that Muslims and Jews cannot eat for religious reasons. In Strasbourg, pork soup was banned this month after officials deemed it could disrupt public order, while police in Paris, have closed soup kitchens 'for administrative reasons' in a bid to avert already simmering racial tension.

"Simmering" -- ha ha. I love reporters. So Freudian. Of course, it's also fun to think that the French police believe that saying, "no, you can't eat today because of what the Muslims & Jews believe," will help avert racial tension.

That's something I've noticed about states that use an egalitarian social model: They're kind'a stupid when it comes to dealing with their poor. Hey, wait a minute...

Although no ban exists in Paris, police have closed soup kitchens in the capital's Montparnasse and Gare de l'Est train stations...Volunteers were ordered to re-seal soup containers on the basis they did not have the necessary permits to distribute food.

The diligent researchers of the Bureaucrash Activist network have found that the state's permitting process adheres to the consistent French political theory, "if you didn't bring enough for the whole class, then you can't have any either."

A leading French anti-racism movement, the Movement Against Racism and for Friendship Between Peoples, has urged Interior Minister Nicolas Sarkozy to ban pork soup give-aways throughout the country...."Schemes with racial subtexts must be denounced," Strasbourg's mayor Fabienne Keller said.

I didn’t realize you could make soup with a racial subtext. A prejudicial rue, perhaps. Or maybe if you replaced the chicken base with Crow. Hmm.

French President Jacques Chirac has said that he would move to persuade Parliment to ban pork throughout the country. "We must work to eliminate these meals of racial hatred from our menus, in order to build a society of Liberty, Equality, and Fraternity, just like it says on our money." Further plans include making concessions to vegans by banning all non-essential animal products; as well as requiring all restaurants to provide filtered straws to appease the Jainists.

Okay, yeah, I made that last block up. I'm sorry. It was a cheap shot - I knew you'd believe anything after reading about real French social policy.

"…let them eat cake"

------------------
sh(A)ne
Minister of Truth

I’ve been working on a little “research” project, checking out the network of Indymedia sites to get a better feel for what the statists are thinking these days. In order to find out exactly what's going on in those greasy little heads of theirs, I decided to post some "articles", and see what kind of response they'd get. I’ve included links to some of my antics below for you to enjoy… if they’re still there:

• San Diego Indymedia - Progressives Against Progress Protest Proposal (Phew!) Scroll down.
• LA Indymedia "hidden posts" page – basically an entire page of their site devoted to my efforts.
• SF Bay Indymedia - The article I sort’a borrowed & fixed a little bit. The Spanish at the bottom says "[long] live the low-price revolution!"
• Kansas City Indymedia - This one was funny, until it got serious
• Pittsburgh Indymedia - The infamous Greenpeace “solar-powered” ark
• Atlanta Indymedia - My personal favorite here. (It's in response to a "call for action", so you may want to take a look at that first.)

I’d encourage you to occasionally add your voice to the mix on your local (or not-so-local) Indymedia site, but be sure not to be a jerk about it. Play by the rules they’ve set, usually listed in the “About Us” section. That way, if they bitch or take your posts down, you’ll have a good reason to get loud & make everybody else on their site see what happens when “democracy” replaces the rule of law. ;)

(…or the rule of rule, I guess, for us anarcho-capitalists, but that just seems so confusing to write)

- Lean more about Indymedia at the Ministry of Intel -

Waaaay back when the internet was still shiny & new, and full of nothing but star trek & erotic fiction & erotic fiction about star trek, one of my favorite pastimes was to copy & paste some random bit of erotic fiction into a Word document & use the find/replace tool to change select words that you'd expect to find in such writing, into words that you wouldn't expect to find...a little adjustment of the grammar, and then I’d be all set to e-mail the resulting masterpieces off to friends & family.

Well, for reasons I won’t go into here, I've been trying to get a feel for what sort of stuff will make it past the censors on the various Indymedia sites. Some of the editors have been real efficient at taking my posts down, while others seem not to notice or care what's up there. The worst so far has been the LA site, which doesn't seem to give a crap what you post, so long as there's nothing pro-free market involved ...so I decided to test that theory, and this old pastime came back to mind.

Here’s a little sample for you, though it’s much funnier to see it on their website…if it’s still there. (From, "Wal-Mart Sucks: Fiction")

…With my hands on your underpaid staff I stroke you. I slowly twist my head from side to side making sure my moist lips stay in contact with your obscenely-high profits. I taste more employee benefits as they ooze from the underpaid staff. Your low-low prices are very hard. And you are moaning, groaning, crying out in a whisper, “always! Always!” …I love to see you this way. So entrepreneurial. Wanting my business so bad. With one hand for you I use the other to take a few strokes up and down my sweatshop. I am wet and ready to buy; I’m not some left-wing hippie, hatin’ on you for your success. I yearn to feel your low-low prices inside me. But I must not succumb to such urges. Not yet! (Maybe after the protest.)

Motivated by Jason's post about this Missouri Senator's proposal to reduce drunk-driving by selling only warm beer (??!), I decided to drop the good Senator a line.

Now, I don't want to give anyone the impression that I would belittle myself by writing to "beg" any elected ruler to "please" see things my way. I know that trying to influence legislators is a complete waste of time when you think like I do -- like most of us here do: Every request is essentially a request to give up some of that power that every person, once they've acquired it, will fight to defend in order to make the world just a little more like (s)he wants it to be. It's only natural.

I realize that the only way to make a lasting change in favor of freedom is to change the culture; the politicians' policies will follow, and hopefully disappear entirely if I have my w(A)y.

Don't beg the politicians, or bother working for "political" change. Mock them. Demoralize them. Take every opportunity to belittle them as publicly as you can, and to make others see exactly how senseless it is to put our sovereignty in their hands.</rant>
..................................

I saw this issue as a perfect opportunity to do just that: I sent a copy of my letter to Sen. Alter's staff, as well as the editors of every newspaper in Missouri. I realize that my letter will likely not be printed, because most papers have a policy against publishing letters from outside their distribution area...not to mention, my letter is way too long for most reader-response pages. But, the fact is, it will be read by an editor at each of those papers, and the ideas it contains may stick in the minds of each of those editors as they form their own opinions. (This is what we call "meme spreading") That's the true power of writing letters like these.

So, enjoy the letter. I tried to make it fun to read &ndash since that is after all what you're trying to get people to do when you write something! Humor gives "memes" life; it helps them to stick in peoples' minds, and to spread. </lesson>

Now let's see if these memes...

    ...the idea that legislation can be pointless, even if it sounds like it's
    for a good cause

    ...the idea that using legislation to try & solve some problems can lead
    to a need for even more overbearing legislation to achieve the intended result

    ...the idea that the business of senators is only as worthy of our
    submission as the ideas that spring from the minds of fifth-graders

...can find their way out into the "cultural consciousness" of the show-me state.

Dear Senator Alter,

I’m writing you concerning your proposed Senate Bill 763, which would ban the sale of cold beer in order to curb drunk driving. It has occurred to me that your bill, while technically brilliant, is in need of modification in order to achieve its lofty goal:

According to scientific testing performed by the Discovery Channel’s “Mythbusters”, it is possible to chill a warm six pack down to a thirst-quenching 35 degrees in less than five minutes by submerging it in a cooler filled with iced salt-water. This time can be cut in half by instead spraying the bottles with the contents of a dry chemical fire extinguisher, though some clean-up time would be required before consuming the beer in this case. Regardless, each of these methods makes it possible to turn store-bought warm beer into tasty intoxicating cold beer in as little as two miles in afternoon traffic.

I understand that the idea for your proposal was the result of a brainstorming exercise performed by a Jefferson County fifth-grade class. I can understand why you would be tempted to look to fifth-graders for guidance in governing the state of Missouri; after all, the outstanding decision to name the American Bullfrog the official state amphibian during the previous session came at the recommendation of a fourth-grade class in Kansas City. This idea, coming from the efforts of fifth-graders, must be one year better still. However, I think its clear why, in this case, even fifth-graders have their shortcomings:

Fifth-graders have had precious little experience handling or consuming beer. (Even in Missouri.) They simply cannot be expected to understand how quickly and satisfyingly it can be cooled. Thus, they could not have possibly realized that banning either ice or salt-water, as well as all types of dry-chem fire extinguishers, would be a necessary element of any attempt to cut down on drunk driving by imposing a waiting, or "cooling-off" period on the purchase of beer.

I strongly encourage you to immediately amend your proposal to include a ban of these two dangerous and troublesome items. I also hope that this oversight does not discourage you from relying on schoolchildren for direction when crafting future legislation. It is in the end, after all, all for the children.

Yours Most Sincerely,

Crasher sh(A)ne
Minister of Truth for the
Bureaucrash Activist Network

Getting an early start on my new-year's resolution: To make sure and read stuff that isn't related to school. I'm just finishing up Theory and History by Ludwig von Mises, and came across a quote that I believe sums up the role of Bureaucrash in the freedom movement. We are, after all, "the heralds and disseminators of beneficial ideas," and it's our role to spread these ideas out into the culture in a way that others will take to and understand. If the statists don't hear our message, then it's our methods & our expressions that need to change.

A civilization is the product of a definite world view, and its philosophy manifests itself in each of its accomplishments. The artifacts produced by men may be called material; but the methods resorted to in the arrangement of production activities are mental – the outcome of ideas that determine what should be done and how... [continued]

The philosophy that is the characteristic mark of the West, and whose consistent elaboration has in the last centuries transformed all social institutions has been called individualism. It maintains that the ideas – the good ones as well as the bad – originate in the minds of an individual man. Only a few men are endowed with the capacity to conceive new ideas. But as political ideas can only work if they are accepted by society, it rests with the crowd of those who themselves are unable to develop new ways of thinking to approve or disapprove the innovations of the pioneers.

There is no guarantee that these masses of followers will make wise use of the power vested in them. They may reject the good ideas – those whose adoption would benefit them – and espouse the bad ideas that will seriously hurt them. But if they choose what is worse, the fault is not theirs alone. It is no less the fault of the pioneers of the good causes in not having succeeded in bringing forward their thoughts in a more convincing form. The favorable evolution of human affairs depends ultimately on the ability of the human race to beget not only authors, but also heralds and disseminators of beneficial ideas.

Ja$on has been serving as our Crasher-in-Chief for just over four years now. During that time, he has transformed Bureaucrash into the well-known & well-respected organization that it is; turning it from a side-project of the Henry Hazlitt Foundation, into its own independent entity, and making the word crash synonymous with activism among libertariansand then some. (Its like Band-aid people dont even think about it anymore. Hows that for meme-spreading?!)

Hes been a friend and a very capable co-conspirator of mine for the last seven years; and weve been given the opportunity to go on more than our fair-share of adventures together during that time, thanks to this incredible organization that hes helped to build. I, for one, sleep easier knowing that there are people like him out there, who have dedicated their lives (not just their spare time) to fighting for the cause of liberty. (Dont let the fact that Im writing this at 4:30am detract from that last statement.)

Okay, I think that just about does it for my being nice this year. Im starting to feel a little queasy.

Happy Birthday + 1/12th! ;)

Crasher sh(A)ne

Minister of Truth for the

Bureaucrash Activist Network

I was asked to lead a presentation on "ageism" and youth rights at the ACLU's College Freedom Tour, which took place in Madison, WI today.  The presentation went really well, though I'm not certain that it was exactly what they had in mind. There were 60 students signed up for my workshop; unfortunately less than half that number showed.  (Most of the students in attendance were there on field trips from schools around the state.  One of the busses from upstate broke down, causing a couple classes to not make it to Madison.)

Still, there are now at least a few more high-school-aged market-activists out there tonight than there were last night.  My "voting without voting" message went over very well, and my two co-presenters (both high-school students) were very receptive.  Though a couple of the adults in the audience squirmed a bit when I described my theory of market activism over legislative action, the students that made up the bulk of the crowd listened with interest and open minds.

I demonstrated the difference between the effort needed to pass legislation to regulate business v. the effort needed to persuade businesses via market activism by staging a mock meeting with a fictitious legislator:

I went to the legislator (one of my co-presenters), and said that I wanted her to pass a law that forbid company x from selling fake chicken in its restaurants.  Of course, the legislator responded that she'd like to help, but couldn't do anything for me.

I then went to the audience and had 10% of the people stand up, representing the number of people that I'd managed to persuade to side with me.  I returned to the legislator.  Still nothing.

Then I had 20% stand.  Then 30%.  Then 40%...and, of course, still nothing, though the legislator's reaction was more sympathetic & understanding each successive time.  Finally, I had 50% +1 stand, and had everybody take a look around to see what it would take to ensure the passage of a law that would get me what I was asking for.

Then we talked about what people thought it would take to convince a business to change its ways through the "voting w/o voting" method of applying economic, rather than legislative pressure.  I started by asking if anyone was familiar with the group of activists who were trying to demand that fast-food chains start providing healthier alternatives to the oversaturated products they usually sell.  One brave soul was willing to fill the group in on the details of the activists' demands; for this he was rewarded with one of the LPWI's "Bill of Rights: Void Where Prohibited By Law" t-shirts I had with me.

I explained that though many of the fast-food activists were seeking a solution through legislation, the situation never came to that.  Almost every fast food chain in business now has some form of "healthy" (healthier) menu available -  Be it Arby's with its "Market fresh" deli style sandwiches, or McD's with its new salads, it seems that everybody has listened to the small group of activists, and responded to settle their concerns.

Why did this happen??

I asked them to think about the stock report on the nightly news and the fact that that very minor losses in value trigger severe responses from businesses, and explained that businesses become concerned when they loose the support of only a small fraction of their consumers.  I explained that, for the stock market, anything over a 20% loss in total value was considered a "crash" - a rare & major event - and used that as the upper bound for what it could possibly take for an individual business to respond.  We decided that, if a business lost 10% of its customer base due to a specific practice, that it would definitely be enough for that business to change the practice.  (I illustrated/exaggerated the response, describing the sirens & flashing lights that would be going off in Bill Gates' office; the pneumatic tubes sending messages screaming from room to room.)  Again I had 10% of the room stand while I was making my point.  They seemed to agree that it looked much easier to persuade 10%, rather than 50%+1.

I then gave a couple examples of how this knowledge could not only be used to put pressure on businesses, but also on governments.  One of the examples I gave was an idea discussed at a meeting of the Alachua County Liberty Project, which involved promulgating the fact that students in our college town were organizing a boycott of businesses that refused to publicly oppose a proposed ordinance that we disagreed with.  The plan was to ask business owners whether or not they supported this "dance-hall ordinance", explaining our opposition, and our desire to only spend our money in businesses that stood with us.  Those who agreed with us would be asked to display a sign stating their opposition to the ordinance, which would be the signal to students that it was okay to shop there.

The idea seemed to go over well.  Almost all the students there are subject to some sort of curfew law where they live, and liked the idea that they could try something like this to empower themselves and gain a voice.  (I threw in a plug for the PNV "Stop the Mayfair Mall Curfew" campaign:  www.PoliticalNonviolence.org/?groupid=LPWI -- click "campaigns" to get there.)

The focus of the workshop was supposed to be "ageism" and youth rights; the other speakers had originally planned to focus on the ACLU's proposal for lowering the voting age (to some other arbitrary age??), but I think my presentation may have convinced many of the attendees that, whether you have the right to vote or not, market activism is a more efficient method for making change.

Along with this knowledge, each person took home a packet that my co-presenters and I put together, which included (among other things) copies of Bureaucrash's "Liberty is the soul's room to breathe" and "Let Each Person Decide" flyers; a copy of the SP's "Sustainable Solutions to Social Challenges" booklet, which explains that "education and not legislation is the real liberal solution to our problems"; a copy of ISIL's "Libertarianism is the path to peace..." booklet; and a "Selective Slavery" card (a parody created by the LPWI) for all the young men to fill out on their 18th birthdays.  Not a bad take for a class field trip, and not a bad way to spend an unemployed afternoon!

Today's the big day for the protesters.  I wasn't too sure what to expect, since it seems that there have been so few people here during the other protest events.  Today was the exception, though - protesters came in from all over the country (Mexico), to march down one of the main streets and up to the barricades that prevented them from reaching the convention center, where the WTO meetings were being held.  
 

Our plan for today was risky:  We set up a stand along the main traffic circle in downtown Cancun, where many of the protesters had been camping out for the previous week.  It was about 400 yards from the barricade, where the protesters were planning to end their march.  We operated under the guise of offering sodas & bottled water for sale at either a free trade price (50 pesos), or a "fair trade" price (200 pesos), which covered such things as a living wage, health insurance, and child care for our employees, as well as union dues and government tariffs.  
 
The timing couldn't have been better.  Its been really really hot the whole time we've been here, and today was no exception.  The humidity was even worse than I ever remember it being when I lived in Florida, and our whole group had grown accustomed to walking around in clothing drenched with sweat.   
 
The results of the sale were about what we expected:  about 75% sold for the free trade price, while the remainder sold at the "fair trade" price - evidence that even in a free-market system, people who understand the benefits will voluntarily pay more for a product, regardless of a less-expensive alternative.     
 
However, this was not the purpose of our operation.  In fact, Starchild only thought about keeping track of the sale once it was already underway.  What we were looking for was the reaction to our sale...and it was really entertaining.  Tom and I set up in locations to the front and rear of the stand with video cameras, as if we were documenting the protest march.  We concealed a microphone on Louis, and another on the table so we could record the interactions.  
 
At first, the passers-by were sort-of confused.  Many stopped to read the sign, and stood there with perplexed looks on their faces.  You could almost see the reality of the situation set in, as people realized that this "fair trade" thing they were promoting was going to make things cost them a lot more.    
 
...and then came the crowds.  Thousands of people marched over the hill, many of them dressed up in home-made body armor and shields, carrying all sorts of makeshift weapons, wearing gas masks and army boots.  One American protestor, a rarity among the crowd, came over to confront Louis about the sale, and explain that "this isn't what fair trade is all about".  She insisted that fair trade referred to fair treatment of the _producers_ of goods, and not the people selling them.  She was really upset about the fact that we were selling Coca-Cola products, since Coca-Cola is a giant multi-national corporation that epitomized everything the protesters were against.  I got a nice close-up shot of the Sony video camera that she was holding in her left hand, while making angry gestures to Louis with her right.  
 
The march was the largest that we'd seen since we arrived in Cancun.  There were plenty of so-called "anarchists" on hand, who firmly believe that private property must be destroyed (both in practice, and in concept), in order to promote liberty.  At one point, a group of them, all armed, encircled Louis & our stand, holding hands to form a human chain around it.  Others motioned to one another, preparing to deface our set-up with cans of black spray-paint.  We decided that perhaps it was time to pack up & go. I radioed the others.
 
We regrouped, and, after Louis changed clothes to change his appearance slightly, returned to the crowd to document the action.  The protestors ended up pulling apart the barricade, piece by piece, in order to try and confront the wall of Federales in riot gear on the other side.  I'm not sure whether such a confrontation ever took place; if it did, it must have been pretty small, as I never did see any real commotion.  The crowd was pretty large, and pressed tight against the remainder of the barricade.
 
Despite the crowd's size, the media still made up a substantial percentage of those present.  I took the opportunity to hand out press releases (discretely) to about 15 news crews, and talked to several of them for quite a while.  
 
One crew (actually two brothers from London) were there working on a documentary film.  I handed one of them (Thom??) a press release, still folded from my pocket.  He opened it, and seeing the Bureaucrash logo on top, said, "Oh, you're with the free trade guys who are here."  I responded, "If you've heard of us, then we must be doing our job pretty well."  He concurred, and told me that "people are talking" about us, though I gathered from his tone, that it wasn't in a good way.  No matter.
 
I gave one interview to a reporter for the NPR syndicated show, Voice of America.  Keep your ears open for me.

The Three-Day Journal of a Bureaucrasher on the Road, Part One:

Five a.m. on Friday Scott Dorbert and I finished loading our camping gear into the Jeep Liberty, and left to pick up a fellow crasher, who was waiting for us at the office of the LP-Metro Milwaukee. Half an hour later, we were on the road, ready to begin the 660 mile trek from Milwaukee, WI to Peter Jaworski’s house in Orono, Ontario. I planned our departure so that we’d be arriving in Ann Arbor just after noon, in hopes that we could meet up with some UMichigan ‘crashers in time for lunch. Unfortunately though, I hadn’t been able to get in touch with anyone who could make it.

We’d initially decided to scrap the UMichigan detour, but twenty minutes before we left the house, Scott & I changed our minds and decided to make the most of it. I made a last-minute visit to the Bureaucrash website to download and print everything that a guerilla activist could possibly need for an uninvited descent onto a foreign college campus. I grabbed my pocket-stapler and a roll of tape, and added them to the gear in the truck.

Seven hours later, we arrived in Ann Arbor. After asking some of the locals for directions to the student union, we found our way to campus, and wandered up the strip looking for a decent place to eat, stopping intermittently to post the “Earth First…” and “Politics Hurt” fliers that I’d downloaded. We found a small sandwich shop, and quickly learned all about Aaron’s theory on eating out, “find the cheapest thing on the menu, and order it”. We also discovered that he doesn’t like giving his credit card to strangers (waitresses), so we put his meal on my card instead. Very educational.

After lunch, we spent another hour and a half wandering around campus, hanging more fliers as we went. I’d printed the flyers on some semi-gloss printing paper that I always keep on hand just for such emergencies (you can get it real cheap at Office Depot, if you look for the off-brand stuff); the flyers stood out brilliantly among the dozens of others, and as I walked back down the strip, it was hard not to notice that Bureaucrash had been there.

We got back on the road at about 3:30 with our sites set on the Detroit/Windsor border-crossing. When we arrived, the border guard asked us where we were going, and what business we had there. I explained that we were a group of young, anti-government Bureaucrash activists traveling to a libertarian seminar just east of Toronto. Surprisingly, we were waved through without further question. (Maybe I did explain our intentions a bit more subtly.) This worked out just fine for Scott, who had “forgotten” to declare the carton of cigarettes he had in his backpack; the cost which in Ontario is roughly $7.00 per pack, over 75% of which is tacked on by federal and provincial taxes.

The Ambassador bridge, which connects Detroit to Windsor, is the busiest border crossing in North America. It’s said that roughly 35% of the $1.5 billion in trade that crosses the US/Canadian border each day, crosses right there. Coincidentally, it’s also the only privately-owned border crossing between the two nations. Traffic was tight due to road construction, but we made it through without too much of a delay, stopping for gas when we reached the Canadian side.

We discovered quickly that Canada, though often thought of by Americans as simply an extension of our northern border, is indeed just “foreign” enough to remind you that you’re not at home anymore. The language (at least in Ontario) is of course the same, and I didn’t have any trouble converting from gallons to litres (even though they do spell it funny), but paying $52 to fill up the tank did freak me out just a little bit. I had no idea what the US/Canadian $ exchange rate was, and was only somewhat comforted by the fact that Bureaucrash was covering our fuel costs. We pulled out of the station, passing through two intersections with flashing green traffic signals (having absolutely no idea what they signified), and got back on the road toward Toronto.

We pulled in to Toronto around 9:30 local time, and found a small pizza restaurant to grab some dinner. I was sort-of surprised to find that the restaurant didn’t take American money. I guess I really shouldn’t have been – I mean, we don’t usually take Canadian money in the states – but still it caught me off guard. Scott & Aaron both had Canadian currency, so they were set. The guy running the shop didn’t know the exchange rate, and so we decided that four dollars American sounded fair. Close enough.

Refueled by the pizza, we got back in the Jeep all fired up and ready to make the last hour of the trip east to Orono. It was only then that I realized that the directions I’d downloaded from MapQuest only went as far as Toronto. I had directions to get us from the Orono exit off the highway to our destination, but as for getting from Toronto to Orono, we were at a loss. None of the locals had even heard of the place. After about an hour of unsuccessfully asking directions in the predominantly Caribbean neighborhood we were in, we decided to get back on the highway and head East. I figured if we hit the Atlantic, we’d know we went too far.

Fortunately, our guess paid off. We had decided on the correct eastbound highway out of Toronto, and arrived at the Jaworski residence at just after 12:30 local time. Tentatively I knocked on the door, not certain yet that we were in the right place. We were greeted warmly by the whole family -- Peter, his sister Agata, and their mom & dad, all of whom, as best I can tell, were just about to head off to bed. We sat out on the patio for about an hour, enjoying the conversation, a much-needed beer, and the warm rural air. By that point the 18 hours of driving had started to take its toll, so we headed off to the back of the property to set up camp next to the lake. I slept like a baby, getting all the rest I could before the start of what would prove to be an invigorating weekend to follow.

To be continued…